Thursday, April 18, 2013

The antidote to pornography?

I ran across a link to something that really resonated with me the other day and I wanted to share it with you.  But first let me give you some background.
As a boy, my introduction to pornography came about when I was around 12 to 15 years old I guess.  My mom asked me one day if I had let my older brother use my headphones, which I had.  I mentioned that to him later and he said it was probably because the headphones had been in his room on top of a Playboy magazine.  She had been cleaning his room or something and happend to see the magazine, we suspect.
  However, he showed me the magazine and that was that.  There were other instances as I grew older when I saw my first porn video, albeit a black and white 8mm video that the neighbor brought over to show dad and us boys with the excuse that we had the movie projector (yeah, right).
  I never was someone who paid or subscribed to any porn sites, but there were many occasions where I viewed or looked at porn.
  Was I obsessed with porn?  I don't know if 'obsessed' is the right word, as I said I never subscribed to anything, but if I started looking at it on the Internet, the hours would fly by before I knew it.
   It was after my children had grown up and I had gotten tired of the sexy porn type images you can so easily find on the Internet or see in a lot of movies that showed nudity only in a sexual way that I became disenchanted with porn.  Oh, I still watched the videos of "nude massages" every once in a while, but since they usually turned into a sexual encounter, even those became disturbing.  That was because I had found my antidote to porn.
  We had our daughter and grandson living with us before and after his birth and he became my buddy and I became his male role model.  After my son had a run-in at his work with an issue that brought his porn habit to light for me, I started to wonder how both his porn and my daughter's free-wheeling sexual life came about.
  It was about that time that I found a web site that featured pictures of nude women that were not sexually or suggestively posed.  That web site has since gotten much more sexualy suggestive in the pictures it shows now.  I do not recommend it now like I have in the past on naturist forums, but here is part of their philosophy that got me interested.  If this is copyrighted material, I apologize to the owner of that site and will remove it if requested.

"So, to sum up, in line with the purposes and principles outlined above, the goals of DOMAI would be:
A world where beauty is appreciated and celebrated, where nudity is natural, and where there is no shame in looking."

   There used to be a list of 10 or so reasons that clarified this statement even more, but I can't find that list right now.  However, it was this seeing the naked body in a completely different way that made me realize just how ugly sexually enticing images were to me.  I realized  that I actually felt this way even when absorbed in watching or looking at them.  Maybe it was a bit of guilt from my Catholic upbringing.  Maybe it was guilt about looking at them as a substitute for my wife.  I don't know, but seeing a truly non-sexual picture of a fully nude frontal view woman was freeing and finally made sense of what I had been looking for all those years without even knowing it.  I even realized after a while that when I brought the site up to see who the 'Beauty of the Day' was, the first thing I looked at was her face.  Then after I looked at her smile or her eyes, did I glance down to see her breasts or pubic area.
  I think it may have been one of the weekly newsletters at that site that pointed me toward a naturist forum.  It was http://www.nudist-resorts.org/.  I started reading and responding but still found something missing.  It was http://www.naturist-christians.org/ that brought the whole thing full-circle.  Here was nudity as God intended at the beginning.  Here were messages I could really relate to.  It showed me that nudity and my Catholic upbringing could actually do-exist.  Here also was a possible way out of the dilemma of my own children's foray into sexual conduct outside of where I wanted them to be.
  The question I began to ask myself is "Can this sexually pervasive attitude be changed?"  I read that non-sexual nudity where children from birth - or at least very young on up - see it in the home situation gives them the understanding of the naked body.  They are more likely not to be dragged into that "WOO-HOO look at the naked lady in the magazine or on the Internet!" syndrome that leads them down the road to a porn obsession or worse - addiction.
  That is why I started being nude around the house.  I started out wrong, but that is maybe another blog post.  I wanted my grandson to see both genders nude while showering, getting ready, dressing as well as throughout the house doing normal daily tasks.  That is still a work in progress with the rest of the family, but I still feel strongly about it.
  One of the reasons I think it is extremely important to show him that non-sexual, "Casual Nudity in Kansas" is good was re-enforced by a podcast from my favorite host Stephane Deschane from The Naturist Living Show.  He did a podcast on Pornography which I highly recommend you listen to.  You can find it here: Naturist-Living -Pornography.  In this podcast he interviews a University professor/researcher who wrote the book pictured below.

Pornland; How Porn has Hijacked our Sexuality - Click Image to Close There were many startling things that I heard, but the one that really got my attention was where she said that the average age for boys to see what she called "gonzo porn" or the really hard-core stuff is age 11. AGE 11!!!  No wonder so many men are struggling with a porn addiction!  That made me want even more to share the good nudity message with my family.  It is still not well received, but it is at least tolerated by my wife as she will let him in the bathroom when we have gotten out of the shower and are primping in front of the mirror nude.
  A link to a different podcast really brought home that pornography is not limited to any person or profession, and that good, casual, non-sexual nudity can very well be the antidote and the vaccine against pornography for not only our children, but for us adults that view it.   I have a few issues with some of the messages in the blog as a whole, but it has a very good message about the effects of porn and how to combat it.  The link I mentioned at the top of this VERY LONG post is: Our_Bodies_and_Our_Sexuality--Pastor_Bill .  Please listen to it all the way to the end.  It has some amazing revelations and I wish every man - and his wife - in the world would listen to his testimony of how he was able to combat his porn habit.  There are other sites that say pretty much the same thing, but I have rambled on way too long this time, so I will end it here.
  If you have any desire to view porn,or if you know or suspect anyone else that may, point them to this site or any of the podcasts, especially the last one by Pastor Bill.

May God Bless you and your family and allow my humble words to help just one of His children to overcome the power of the devil in this trap of his called Pornography.

Peace,
Jeanluc

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Naturism is Family Friendly?

I saw a quote on Pinterest that said "If it isn't Family it isn't Naturist".  That may sound a bit strange in our 'protect the children from ever seeing a naked body' society, but I think it is EXACTLY on target.  I get bothered each time I hear of a popular naturist resort that changes its policy to be an "Adults Only" facility.  Obviously, even though they say nothing sexual is going on, what other reason could there be for preventing children from going there.  While I do admit that there can be pressure put on them from the local authorities, their attitude and persistance in the true naturist lifestyle would show that there is nothing wrong with having a family resort.
  There are other naturist resorts in most of these areas as well as clothing-optional beaches, so what other reason would there be to change to an adults-only resort.  If their business was suffering because those who want to explore a bit of a wilder side of nude activities, maybe they should take a look at naturist resorts that focus heavily on the family atmosphere such as Bare Oaks Naturist Resort that I have mentioned in other posts.  From what the owner there says, they are overflowing with young people and families with children of all ages.
  Maybe if a resort subscribed to the "Ethical Naturist" philosophy as espoused by Bare Oaks and others, they would be able to increase their membership and attendance without bowing to the pressures of the Adult-oriented crowd.
  Just my take on a situation that I find undermines the way I want to experience naturism.  I am putting those adult-only resorts on notice - I will never attend your resort and I will do everything I can to encourage other naturists not to attend either.  There, that's my story and I'm sticking to it!!!

Peace,
Jeanluc

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Healthy Naturism

  Ok, I am on a roll today, so I figured I would add another post.  Actually this thought came about after listening to a podcast from – you guessed it – “The Naturist Living Show”.  In a past post I have discussed the “Bra vs Breast Cancer” debate.  Stéphane has mentioned it in one of his previous podcasts, but the one from July 31, 2012 has an interview with Sydney Ross Singer who is the researcher and co-author of the book “Dressed to Kill”.  You can listen to the podcast by clicking on this link: Healthy Naturism Podcast ,  or you can go to the Naturist Living Show web site which I have supplied a link to in the right column and download it to your computer or iPod.  This interview gave a much better insight into the controversy surrounding the whole bra vs breast cancer debate.  Mr Singer tells of his experiences with drug companies, doctors and the mass media as well as others who deny there is a reason to study this issue and why they work so hard to keep it from happening.  I think most of you can guess those reasons, but this interview makes it clear what they are.  It is a really good topic to discuss and I feel , as I said in my previous post on this topic, that we as men owe it to our wives, daughters, sisters and any woman we care about to spread this message to them lovingly and yet urgently.

Since I am discussing the health benefits of naturism, I can’t pass up the chance to mention the benefit of exposing your skin to the sun and getting a much-needed dose of Vitamin D.  Stéphane also has a podcast on this aspect of naturism on April 18, 2010.  You can listen to it at: Sunshine and Vitamin D Podcast or go to the bottom of this page Sunshine and Vitamin D to get the full story..  Many people will look at you in shock when you mention you want to expose your skin to the sun for any reason let alone to become healthier.  After all, the sun CAUSES skin cancer, it doesn’t prevent anything – or does it?  While this is again one of those controversial issues, it appears likely that getting a HEALTHY dose of sun does increase your intake of Vitamin D which studies have shown to help us fight illnesses like cancer, hypertension, diabetes, osteoporosis, influenza, psoriasis, Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D.), Pre-Menstrual Syndrome (P.M.S.), sleep disorders and autoimmune diseases. (This list is taken from The Naturist Living Show April 18, 2010 podcast description  titled “Sunshine and Vitamin D” Thanke you Stephane).  When I mention a HEALTHY dose of sun, that means that you stay in the sun just long enough so that you end up with a slight pink tint to your skin.  Getting too much sun, as in a blistering sunburn, is most likely the culprit that causes the skin cancer, etc that we who overdid it in our younger years now have our Dermatologists remove.
  Don’t take my word for these health benefits.  My purpose is to lay out the possibilities and let you do your own research.  Listen to these podcasts.  Read the articles and books.  Make the changes in your life and see if it makes a difference for you.  My wife sometimes thinks I am too gullible, but when there is no negative side of trying something, my take on it is “Why not try it?”.  What can it hurt?  What could it possibly help?  If the 'help' option outweighs the 'hurt' option, I feel I would be nuts not to do it.

Peace,
Jeanluc

Ethical Naturism

  Sorry that it has been a while since my last post.  Time just gets away from all of us.  If you have been checking back occasionally to see if I have posted anything new,  leave me a comment.  If I see that people are actually reading this, I will try to post more often.
  As you know from my posts, I listen to a podcast called “The Naturist Living Show”.  This is the effort of the owner of a naturist park near Toronto Canada.  Throughout his podcasts (there are over 40 of them now), he talks about “Ethical Naturism”.  He even has one show dedicated to the subject.  You can listen to it here:   http://feeds.bareoaks.ca/~r/NaturistLivingShow/~5/fPyupSI66sE/Ethical-Naturists.mp3 .
  So what in essence is ‘Ethical Naturism’?  According to Stéphane – and I wholeheartedly agree with him – an ethical Naturist has as their guiding principal the practice of “Respect for Self, Respect for Others and Respect for the Environment.”   Also, the true ethical naturist follows the practice of a non-clothing optional policy.  That is to say that when practical – weather and safety permitting – the ethical naturist is nude.  It seems that that should go without saying, but at many resorts and clubs, clothing optional is the norm.  As mentioned in the podcast listed above, if a person is not encouraged by policy to be nude at a resort or club, they may never be and then they or those that are nude will feel self-conscious about being around the other.  This limits the ability for them to get the complete naturist experience.   It is that complete experience that has been shown to remove the fear and self-consciousness that people are often concerned about when trying naturism for the first time.
  I would encourage you to either subscribe to the Naturist Living Show podcast through iTunes or however you can get them and listen to them all. Download them to your iPod or MP3 player and listen to them as you commute or travel. Start at the beginning and learn how Bare Oaks Family Naturist Park is a shining example of Ethical Naturism.  As you listen, you will get an amazing amount of the good, wholesome, family naturism  philosophy that seems to be making a naturist resort in the cold north country of Canada an extremely popular place to go.

Peace,
Jeanluc

Friday, December 9, 2011

Breast Cancer??

You might wonder how Breast Cancer relates to nudism.  Well, it doesn't - not directly anyway.  However, in my searching for ways to dispel the nudity=sex atmosphere from the minds of those in my family, I stumbled across something that was absolutely astounding.
  In their book, Dressed To Kill: The Link Between Breast Cancer and Bras, authors Sydney Ross Singer and Soma Grismaijer state:
"We had written about this, and the results of our 1991-93 Bra and Breast Cancer Study, in our book "Dressed To Kill: The Link Between Breast Cancer and Bras" (ISCD Press). Our study was conducted on approximately 4700 U.S. women, about half of whom had breast cancer. We asked these women about their past bra-wearing attitudes and habits. What we discovered was that the women in the cancer group had a history of wearing bras tighter and longer than did the non-cancer group. In fact, many women in the cancer group slept with their bras on. Almost none were bra-free. This differed greatly from the non-cancer group.
When the results were analyzed, they revealed that women who wear bras over 12 hours daily have a dramatically increased risk of developing breast cancer compared to bra-free women. In fact, bra-free women have about the same chances of developing breast cancer as men have, and this is over 100 times less than that for women wearing bras 18-24 hours daily. When you consider that smoking increases the incidence of lung cancer 20-30 times, this makes the link between breast cancer and bras 4-5 times greater than the link between cigarettes and lung cancer!"

It is  important to note that this has been the only study on this subject that I can find.  Numerous rebuttals have surfaces saying this was not a scientific study, it was too small of a study to be accurate, yada, yada, yada.
  What I found interesting is that the results were so one-sided even for 2400 women on each side of the line - cancer survivors vs non cancer women.
  I showed this article to my wife and she pretty much said the same - "I don't really believe wearing a bra can cause cancer.  If that were true, the medical profession wold be telling us all to stop wearing bras." 
  Really, I understand any women's skepticism.  After all women have been told from pre-teen onwards that you have to wear a bra.  And mainly it is because not wearing a bra is showing your breasts to men who might take it as a sign that you are inviting sex with them.  There we are right back to the nude=sex bit.
  What I told my wife was this "What if it IS true?  What if taking your bra off when you come home from work instead of wearing it from 7am until 11pm (16 hours) or wearing a camisole or loose fitting shirt to work if possible prevents even 1% chance of you getting breast cancer?  Would it really be so horrible to go without a bra for that reason?"
 I know what cancer is.  I had testicular cancer 20 years ago and remember the surgeries, chemotherapy and sitting at home recuperating while my body groaned with the pain of it all.  I really don't want that to happen to anyone I know, much less the women in my life that might, just might have a chance to prevent it.
  How about you.  Are there any women in your lives.  Wives, daughters, sisters friends that you would like to prevent this from happening to?  Show them this blog.  Ask them to love you enough to at least take their bras off when thy don't need to have them on.
  Have them take a look at the following web sites   007 Breasts - Woman's breasts are for breastfeeding!  This site has links to many other topfreedom sites as well as an entire page related to the Bra vs Breast Cancer discussion.  Another site I have mentioned earlier is Topfree Equal Rights Association (TERA) .  There are many others that have similar information.  Of course there are also many others that link going without a bra or a top by women to be sexual, so beware of what you search for.  Stick with known naturist sites and not necessarily nude sites and follow the good links.
Peace,
Jeanluc

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Republished Wiki on nudity in the home

I thought this article interesting even though it specifically mentions that it is not intended for promoting public nudity.  Since social nudity is common with nudism, the idea of not promoting public nudity needs to be taken as outside of the nudism aspect.

Peace,
Jeanluc



How to Practice Nudity in Your Family


from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

Despite the good intentions of many parents, prohibiting household nakedness can have negative consequences for children.  In our media saturated urbanized world, children like this are primed with an appetite for nudity related subject matter (of which most is unhealthy.)  It takes a bit of work for the affected parent, but you can get over this and help your children to avoid some of these pitfalls of modern living.  Fortunately as a parent you have the unique opportunity to provide a healthy environment for nakedness right in the refuge of your own home. 
Disclaimer:  The purpose here is not to promote public nudity as a method for this How To; quite the contrary (see Warnings section below).  This guide is intended primarily as a tool for parents who want to teach their children a wholesome understanding of human nakedness. This How To is intended primarily for use by parents in their home.

  Steps


  1. Encourage family nudity without being abnormal. Young children have not yet acquired a sophisticated understanding of modesty, and really don't care who sees them naked. This is the time when the parent can mold their conscience without making them self-conscious of nakedness.  This, in turn, will help children associate nakedness to routine activity instead of exclusively naughty activity, helping illicit forms of nakedness to lose their appeal later in life.
  2. Allow your children - from birth - to see you in ordinary nude situations (e.g.- dressing, bathing or showering, using the toilet) or any activity where nudity is a natural part.  By being comfortable with your own body you will naturally convey the message to your children that nudity really is okay and not something to fear. There are naturally times in life when clothes must be worn for protection, for comfort, and to adhere to societal norms. However, by talking with your children about being comfortable with nudity at home, your children will grow up understanding that being nude & being seen nude at home isn't something "uncool, horrible, and utterly embarrassing."
  3. Start allowing/encouraging family nudity during potty training & continue through the school age years and beyond. You'd be surprised how quickly potty training takes root when your toddler/preschooler is allowed to go bare at home, but...be prepared for occasional "accidents" as well, and handle these situations calmly without anger or revulsion.
  4. As they begin to recognize differences between themselves and you or your spouse, explain to them the reason for these differences.  Suggested explanations are: "Mommy's breasts are for giving milk to babies like when you were small"? or "Mommy and daddy have hair down here because our bodies are warmer, and it helps keep our bodies cooler (by retaining sweat)."

  Tips


  • A focal point for nudity that enables the whole family to participate together is very helpful.  An indoor swimming pool is ideal, but not practical for most families.  Saunas are also excellent for this, but are not as common in the U.S. as Europe.  Other water related ideas could be an outdoor pool below or above ground.  A cheaper yet more practical idea that works year round would be a hot tub.  Children see this as a heated kiddie swimming pool they can use water toys in too.
  • A great side benefit to wholesome understandings of the naked body in the home is that when the time comes to explain human reproduction, there will be less tension from the children.  They will not have the distraction of embarrassment when discussing (what for others can be) 'shameful' body parts.  This in turn, will keep the communication lines open during adolescence.
  • There are many great books on pregnancy and adolescence that separate the romantic (i.e. sexual) aspect from the physiological changes of puberty.  These books provide a very neutral clinical look at breast and pubic hair growth during the teen years, and include very candid photos of actual births.  Influences like these help separate nudity from sex in the child's mind, and provide a framework where family nudity can flourish to the benefit of all.
  • Realize that not all shame is bad shame.  Good shame is ingrained to help us avoid compromising situations.  But other shame is the result of social conditioning during childhood, and unnecessarily predisposes us to clothes compulsiveness.
  • Respect others' standards.  One good approach is to point out that other people are not accustomed to nudity, and it's kind to respect their wishes.  This may mean keeping the curtains drawn, or willingly closing the bathroom door when guests are present, for example -- a practice that encourages courtesy, but not shame.
  • Young adolescents naturally develop increased modesty around the time of puberty.  Don't force someone to be nude.  Wearing pants for a while may help the transition.  Being around other teens who role model comfort with their bodies will be reassuring.
  • For families where the children are older it may be difficult to change attitudes.  In some cases big decisions may need to be made in order to break free from habits.  Such changes may include ridding the home of magazines (men's magazines, fashion, or sports related material), television, or other media that subtly foster a "nudity is sex"? mindset.  Peers are also part of the equation.  It may be necessary to move to another region to get a fresh start.  Teenagers especially are very keen on whether the parents walk the talk, so if a parent still models these attitudes so will the teens.
  • The goal is to provide children the opportunity to see nakedness in a way that is almost non-existant in our society:  to make it a neutral, non-sensuous part of everyday life in its proper context.  This goes a long way toward innoculating them from the enticements so easily found outside the walls of your home and in the marketplace.

  Warnings


  • Be careful about with whom you share your family practices.  Not all people will easily come to the conclusions you intended.  Nudity and sex are still considered to be related in our society; this stems partly from puritanical attitudes, but also from decades of hedonistic influence by the swingers movement, from influences such as Hedomism II in Jamaica, the SunnyDaze Resort in Colorado, and events like Nudes-a-Poppin in Indiana.
  • Although this should be obvious to any well-meaning parent, care is advised during moments of intimacy and marital relations.  Since the genitalia are a major source of pleasure during these times, be careful to instead emphasize the primary functions (birth canal, urination) of genitals to younger children.  Anything beyond that may overpower their emotional stage of development and work against the wholesome environment you are trying to maintain.  Marital intimacy is best left behind closed doors.
  • Avoid exposing children to nude photography from fine art, or internet sources as some of this has a subtly skewed pornographic message that untrained eyes will not immediately recognize.  The best example is you, your spouse, and older siblings or relatives who bring a very real element to human nakedness.
  • Exercise proper hygiene. When exercising family nudity, always encourage/require the use of a towel for sitting. As any parent can tell you, young children don't always exercise the very best cleaning methods after using the potty. Don't be embarrassed about teaching good, healthy personal toileting hygiene to your children. They look to you to teach them properly and correctly.


Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Practice Nudity in Your Family.  All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Naturism Podcast

I am not sure why I have not mentioned this before, but I have been a regular subscriber to a podcast that has covered many interesting naturist topics.  The Naturist Living Show is hosted by Stéphane Deschênes, the owner of  Bare Oaks Family Naturist Park in the Toronto Canada area.  Stéphane has interviewed numerous people including the latest who was the original owner of the property back in 1972.  It was a naturist park then also and has transitioned from naturist to textile back to naturist.  The podcasts can be subscribed to through ITunes or downloaded directly from their web site.
  You can see all about the Bare Oaks Family Naturist Park  at their web site.  Just click on the highlighted links to take you directly there or find them under the Links section to the right.   FYI, the history of the park is under the About Us>Historical Information>Park History section of the Bare Oaks web site.

Peace,
Jeanluc